I would like to take this opportunity (in all my hangover glory) to wish all of you readers a blessed New Year. I know I am one day late, but I haven't got the opportunity to properly get the alcohol out of my system before I even try to write coherently (yes, I am a gibberish drunk).
I got back home at six thirty on New Year's Day from a rather insane party (more on that in the next blog post) and New Year's Day just whizzed by and me just staring at the ceiling and telling myself that I shouldn't have drank that extra shot of Smirnoff last night.
So now that I am feeling much better, here's wishing you a Happy New Year and may 2013 be filled with lots of sex, out of the roof orgasms and happiness, in that order. And hopefully herpes-free by 2014.
The other reason why I am writing this post is to express my utter fascination with people's conversation when they are drunk. Alcohol brings out, in my opinion, the best of everybody. I have seen alcohol work it's magic on many people.
Alcohol transforms a quiet introvert into a chatty, charming and funny social butterfly. Of course there should always be moderation in everything and the same rule applies for here for alcohol.
Excessive consumption of alcohol can turn the aforementioned chatty, charming and funny social butterfly into an annoying clown that is asking for a muzzle to be shoved in his or her face.
But really now, the conversations that we have in our drunken stupor has always fascinated me. i find the exchange unintendedly hilarious and not to mention stupidly precious. The gems of conversations that I have overheard (and eavesdropped) last night in the aftermath of New Years along the streets were aplenty.
I have narrowed down the Top 5 drunken conversations that I heard last night that was so charming Amy Winehouse would gibberishly approve.
Drunken Conversation 5th Place:
Star, Melanie, Steve and I were walking around town and walked past this Indian man who was clearly drunk and was hugging his female companion for support. He told her, "I...made a promise to Lord Shiva that I would never drink again. Sharab, sab kuch, nahin hoga (alcohol, everything, never again)!"
Star said to me, "He broke his promise to the Lord. Isn't Shiva the God of Destruction?"
"Good luck to him then," Steve said softly.
Drunken Conversation 4th Place:
We were walking past a shopping centre scouring for a 7-11 to get cigarettes and Gatorade at four in the morning and there was this girl who was slouched against a metal railing and she closed her eyes and massaged her temples saying, "Guys, this is really 2013 already right?"
Ah no honey, we managed to freeze time. Yay.
Drunken Conversation 3rd Place:
I was waiting for Melanie to arrive at The Fullerton where we had a party held by one of Steve's friends and was standing beside a group of boys sitting by the lobby. One of their friends arrived wearing an Abercrombie & Fitch sweater and then one of the boys said, "Eeeuw, you're wearing that? That's so gay!"
Just then a drunken Caucasian man walked past and he shouted, "I'm gay and I'm not wearing an Abercrombie sweater assholes!" and then walked off in a gait much more "fierce" than all of Tyra Banks modeling career.
Drunken Conversation 2nd Place:
The four of us were having supper and at the table beside us, a man was holding a beer can in one hand and his wife's right palm and he slurred, "I promise you, 2013, I would be the best husband for you!"
What lies. Start being a good husband by being sober first I say.
Drunken Conversation 1st Place:
A young woman was seen gyrating outside a building, singing and dancing (badly) to JLO's Dance Again, obviously taking advantage of the alcohol and attention. It was grating and painful and the only redemption was when his equally drunk boyfriend who stood quietly there for a good fifteen seconds, closed his eyes, opened them and said, "Bitch, please."
That made my 2012