Saturday, February 23, 2013

25 Reasons To Not Celebrate Valentine's Day

As a point of reference for 2014.

1) You might have a pollen allergy that you don't know off.

2) Are you a Muslim? Don't even think about it.

3) Inflation of roses. And every other flower there is. (You can try picking flowers at the Botanic Gardens, albeit being crazily risky)

4) Whatever you do, you will never be as romantic as Ryan Gosling.

5) Because it is overrated and you're a fucking hipster.

6) What love song are you going to dedicate to your girlfriend? Boyfriend by Justin Beiber? Don't send the wrong message.

7) It's going to be a weekday.

8) You cannot do a nice romantic home cooked dinner because the last time you tried to fry an egg...let's not even go there.

9) I don't think you would be interested in having a romantic dinner in a crowded restaurant would you?

10) Giving a bouquet of roses doesn't mean you will get laid at the end of the night. Sorry buddy.

11) And what if she's on a no chocolate diet?

12) You don't have a girlfriend to start with.

13) Your Ah Lian girlfriend won't understand the love poem you wrote for her anyways.

14) They're still playing Chinese New Year jingles in shopping centres. Talk about an overkill.

15) It's the middle of the month = no more money.

16) Remember about the poem? Sorry I forgot that you can't write poems. You cannot even write a simple description of yourself in Facebook.

17) Somebody will be late. And you literally, haven't got all day.

18) At this point of time the only "romantic comedy" movie there is, is your life. And not in a good way either.

19) It's Valentines and you're wearing your granny panties.

20) You made a vow that you would never celebrate Valentine's Day until Jennifer Aniston gets married (read: You'll never celebrating it)

21) Your boyfriend is bad in bed so you're not missing out on anything really.

22) Food is always better than sex no matter how much you deny it.

23) You're better off going through a DVD marathon of romantic comedies. At least they have happy endings.

24) The Romance Singapore campaign ended years ago.

25) You're single. Haha.

No comments:

Post a Comment